This video is very long-over an hour, but if you start watching it, you may not be able to stop. Many people have no idea how abusive the family court system is to men, and how the family court system makes it possible for women to abuse men. I have seen it with my own eyes, but even those of us who have seen it personally would like to believe that what we saw was an isolated case, not a widespread thing. Unfortunately, the family court system is set up to hurt men.
This video outlines the many ways in which good, decent men are hurt by the family court system. It shines a light on women at their worst. I have personally known women who use the court system to abuse men: I have seen it with my own eyes, and I am so glad that a female lawyer is speaking up in defense of men.
I have also seen with my own eyes women who are absolute saints. I have seen with my own eyes women who could have so easily used the family court system to punish men who treated them badly, but didn’t, because they put the best interests of their children first. Some of the greatest men I know ended up married to the worst women-and vice versa! I know men who were never abusive, but who just treated their first wives very badly-cheated on them, left them for no good reason, when there were small children involved, but these women realize that just because a man is a bad husband doesn’t mean he is a bad father, and even if he doesn’t deserve to be named father of the year, that doesn’t mean that he deserves to be alienated from his children. I know women who bend over backwards to make sure that the men who treated them badly have a good relationship with the kids-and these men never appreciate it, because they are jerks. But the kids are so much better off, and that is all that matters.
Studies that show that in situations where parents are divorced, kids do best when custody is 50/50, when they spend roughly half their time with each parent. This sounds fair, until you meet some jerk who left his saint of a wife and now wants 50/50 custody of the kids because he just doesn’t feel like being married anymore. It sounds fair, until you see with your own eyes a 2 year old screaming for her mother, who she only gets to see half the time. When I witnessed this situation, it almost drove me out of my mind, but fortunately, the mother was and is a total saint. Her position was that her ex was a lousy husband, but a good father, and she has always done everything in her power to foster a strong relationship between her child and her child’s father. Her jerk of an ex has never appreciated it, and still doesn’t, but her child, who is now grown up, is doing very very well. Every single person I know who had a saintly mother and a father who was kind of a jerk is doing very well. No doubt, it is a very difficult position to be in, but the best interests of the kids should come first. Men don’t deserve to lose their children for the sin of not being total saints, and children definitely do not deserve to lose their fathers because Mom is pissed at Dad because he isn’t a total saint.
This is all very easy for me to say. Both my father and my husband were total saints. But there are so many women out there-women so much better than me-who do the right thing when faced with men who treat them badly. They do what is best for their children, they do it quietly, without fanfare, and they are rarely or never appreciated for it. They are the salt of the earth, and the light of the world, and I mention them because they are not mentioned in this video. Which is all just to say, I know that women are not always evil and men are not always good. The problem is, our family court system does not seem to realize that women are not always good and men are not always evil.