in keeping my sanity, I decided not to open any more of the condolence cards, actually my daughter opened them. But what came in the mail is on hold for a while, maybe till the weekend. Instead I took her credit cards from her wallet and went that route, canceling them etc. American Express is owed about $690, but I told them after the first I will mail out a check. ( when my retirement comes in), Other wise they would attach the estate or some such nonsense, The others were paid off in August.
She was thinking like me. I had my retirement set up so she would get the maximum if I passed on before her. Well the office of personnel management said they would change that for me, also she had a 5k insurance policy with them, and I would get some more from my retirement. as to her, one of her retirement accounts, Emery Worldwide / Consolidated Freightways was set up that if she passed first all of it would go to me for the rest of my life. Not much, maybe 150 / month.
I will get a call on the 30th from Social Security as since she got more from that than me, 2500 vs 250 (approximate), I could get a portion of hers and canceling mine. Strange, why not keep mine and add the portion of hers, I know, the government.
I cut back the cable TV, on the 31st I will only have internet and phone, no TV. I have an antenna, 25 years old but works like a charm. I still get Binghamton NY stations in Scranton, ( 50 miles as the crow flies) .That price will be down from about 215 to 135.
I talked with the home and auto insurance and they need a certificate of death. And I have to find out how to change the deed as well as get a brief will written.
Damn it, I was supposed to go first. But if I did, I suppose the stress would have killed her.
My son said I should try and get a credit report on her to see if there are any credit cards out there that I don’t know of. I don’t know if I can as she was probably already reported as deceased.
My friends, I miss her and do cry. But I have to go on.
Her niece called today they got to be close friends as the niece was the hairdresser. and you know or can imagine how that goes. Much like a bartender and a customer I guess. She told me of some old wives tales about numbers and a scammer called her on the phone with the number like 1111 etc also a little girl called her customer while she was in the chair and asked who was that angel she saw on the video chat. The customer said it was the niece, but the child said no the angel not her.
Spooky and I’m not living up to her expectations I think….
Well that’s the update and the bullshit session. You all take care of yourself from this dammed covid I’m taking my temp several times a day and checking my O2 lever at least twice a day.
Cordially,
Gerry
Praying for you, Gerry.
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Gerry, try to push through the darkness until you again can see the light. God willing it will not be another train coming at you.
Semper Fi
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Still here, and praying with and for you, Gerry.
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Thanks you for sharing with us. I know Simon and all the ‘Ettes were anxious.
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I lost my father recently and if I hadn’t been married, I would have considered him my best friend. The worst part of what you face is spontaneously talking to and asking your wife for advice. I still do that with my dad (in my mind) because there are topics we were both specifically interested in and discussed endlessly.
There is obviously no replacement for your beloved wife so if I have any advice, it is to keep on talking to anyone – to friends, family, etc. It does help replace the ear you must surely be missing.
Best to you Gerry.
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Thanks Guys and Gals, sometimes I catch myself talking to her. Especially when I make a mess as she was all about neatness and cleanliness. I called Care Credit today, even though that card is in my name there was a $14 charge on it and last month a payment of $206.94, why would she leave a $14 charge? Well It turned out to be Netflix. Since I terminated Netflix and started my own, that will go away as it will be on my credit union credit card.
I moved her stand up chest of drawers to look for something that may have fallen behind and I found another credit card. one from Bank of America. It was an old one that she got a replacement for that I could not find. I called the number and they were not very friendly. They said I didn’t have to pay anything in a very fast and clipped voice, I said wait a minute, say that again slowly, they then said it again and said they would sue the estate for the $231.03. I said NO. I’m not involving lawyers, I will pay it off after the first of the month, when my retirement check comes in. Close the account now. They said they can’t close it, but they will freeze it until payment is made and they get a copy of the death certificate. Nasty people and procedures at BOA.
Also had a problem with the credit union and bill pay. I could not get in and didn’t remember her secret questions although I typed them in. The one it kept asking, I answered correctly, but not. You see when they helped me get in I had to replace the two challenge questions with new ones and one of them was the question it kept asking me, so I choose that again and typed in the answer. It would not take it. I tried again and same results then I noticed the answer I used was five letters, it wanted six or more! So I used that answer again and added “123” to it to make it more than 6. Sort of like “soup123”, (numerical soup instead of alphabet soup?).
I wrote them down as well this time. I know she had them written down as well, where, I don’t know.
Finally it’s a pain in the backside to click on “VIEW COMMENT” in my email and hope to make a reply. I have to go to wordpress.com, log-in and then click on the comment. To alleviate some of that I have a menu or a home page on my computer that when I launch Firefox, it launches that HTML document. In it are links to Fox News, Facebook, Duck Duck, Google, Yahoo Amazon and two local news stations. I added WordPress Log-in. So if I want to reply, I open the browser, click on the log-in link, after it puts in my name and password I hit enter then open the link in the email. (This may be easier to understand if you can imagine I have two screens active for my computer normally.)
That’s all for now, Thanks again for the back-up. If someone wants to mention to that other site, just tell I’m surviving and OK.
Gerry_D
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Would you believe it? The credit union blocked our joint account from view and that’s where my retirement check goes to and where I pay bills from, but they did not block her individual account. Tomorrow I have to do the grocery store for a few items, if my bank card don’t work they will loose a customer… Cripes, always something. As soon as the death certificate comes in from the state, I’ll get things organized at the credit union, till then wish me luck.
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I wish you luck.
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Gerry, it may improve your experience here if you were also to become a member. You have to check that box for yourself, amigo mio.
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point me in that direction please… ie: url?
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I think it should be a drop down on our site to become a “Follower,” but I cannot tell you precisely because I do not see the same home page you do.
Maybe Judy or Nanda can help?
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Yes, there should be a follow button, and all you have to do is press it 🙂
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Got it! Thanx,
as an aside, my daughter can’t be by this weekend as one of the ppl at her temporary work place tested positive, so she won’t be by this weekend.
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My son was by on Saturday, he verified the stuff I entered in Bill-Pay, (electronic bill payment by my credit union), that will go out on Monday to the respective companies, Including two amex cards to close them, abt 600 & 200 and all the other mundane bills at the beginning of the month. The only one missing is the gas company. He commented that his also comes in later. I will call the credit union and see if they can attach her credit union visa to mine and close hers.
After church this morning they had a pulled pork and pancake dinner sale for a ten spot. I had a ticket. And had to let it sit for a while and my neighbors behind me generously volunteered to help me with the leaves. While I did around the fish pond and the front, (2/3) of the front They were using leaf blowers to gather behind the house and the lower area into piles and then they started bagging them. I tried the blower in the front, but the gusts of wind negated any efforts. So I used my “:lawn vacuum”. Something like a lawn mower with no blades, just an impeller that sucks them up and blows them into an attached bag. The rains came so we quit.
I showered and then heated the church dinner in the microwave. Hard rolls don’t do well in the microwave. They tend to become hard and gummy when you chew them, but I managed.
I think I will call my brother or my sister, I kind of need to hear a voice besides my own. You all take care and stay safe!
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