Erika Kirk

Erika Kirk has gotten so much criticism. At first, I thought it was unfair, but what Erika Kirk said recently in an interview with Harris Faulkner has caused me to lose all sympathy for her, so I am going to add my two cents.

In the video below, the money shot starts at 5:04 and goes for a minute or two until the end. In it, Erika states that she has no intention of going away, and that there was never a chance that she would fade into the background or curl up in the fetal position after her husband’s assassination. We are constantly reminded that everyone grieves differently, and we are constantly told that we should all admire Erika’s incredible strength, and have empathy for her, but she has no empathy whatsoever for widows who grieve normally and who are not as “strong” as she is. She has no empathy whatsoever for those of us who have curled up in the fetal position after the death of a loved one.

I am a widow. My husband died suddenly almost 7 years ago, after which, I spent the better part of six months pretty much curled up in the fetal position. I didn’t know what to think when I witnessed Erika eulogizing Charlie 2 days after he was killed on national television, but, like most other people, I acknowledged that everybody grieves differently, and I figured that maybe she was just a much stronger person than me.

Two days after my husband died, I couldn’t even go to Denny’s for breakfast, because I was still sobbing uncontrollably, and I didn’t want to cause a scene. The constant, uncontrollable sobbing stopped after a few days. Robin’s memorial service was held two weeks after his death, and someone else read a eulogy that I wrote, because I was still in total shock. Part of me felt like I was letting Robin down by not giving his eulogy myself, but I was seriously afraid that I would end up face down on the floor sobbing my eyes out, and I didn’t want to cause a scene.

After that, I spent the next two months pretty much in hiding. I stayed in my house most of the time, except when my parents needed something. A very dear friend got me through those dark days by calling me every day and telling me jokes and keeping me laughing. This friend and I would spend hours laughing on the phone, and when we weren’t on the phone, I would cry or just listen to music and smoke cigarettes. I couldn’t even think. I couldn’t put two thoughts together to do a blog post or even comment on someone else’s blog post, and I wasn’t paying any attention to current events anyway.

After about 2 months, my financial situation required me to get a part time job, and lucky for me, I found one that did not require me to interact with the public, because even after 2 months, I was in no condition to show my face to the public. I found a job delivering newspapers. I would go out at night and drive around and throw newspapers in driveways while I cried. I wasn’t always crying at this point, but I was still crying a lot. Way too much for a normal job. I needed a job where I could break down crying whenever I needed to. Luckily, I found one.

Granted, I didn’t have children, and I didn’t need to put on a brave face for my children. The way I reacted after Robin’s death might have been an unfortunate luxury, if you can call it that, of being childless, but as I write this, I think of JFK’s assassination, and how his widow reacted. I can relate to Jackie O-not totally, obviously, but when I see the look of total shock and horror and bewilderment and confusion on her face after her husband’s murder, that makes sense to me. That’s where I was after my husband died. I also think of my maternal grandfather, who lost his wife suddenly after the birth of their sixth child: my aunt told me that after my grandmother died, her father spent the next four days sobbing uncontrollably and throwing up. From the way I have heard it described, he was worse off than I was, and he was an unbelievably tough man, but he spent at least a few days curled up in the fetal position after his wife died. He had children, and after a few days, he pulled it together for his kids, but he was nowhere near as “strong” as Erika Kirk. You would not have caught him giving a televised speech 2 days after his wife died. 2 days after his wife died, he was wrapped around a toilet, throwing up and sobbing uncontrollably. Erika Kirk probably wouldn’t approve.

Who is Erika Kirk? Who is this strange woman they are foisting on us and telling us we have to obey? Everything that comes out of her mouth is so obviously scripted. All of it sounds like it was written by Stephen Miller, and all of it overflows with Milleresk venom and rage.

The people who are shoving Erika Kirk down our throats and telling us that she is just stronger than we are, should learn how to read the room. Erika thinks that people who grieve normally are pathetic, and she has every right to her opinion, but she is the most unlikeable woman who has ever appeared on tv, and that is amazing, because it isn’t easy to be the most unlikeable woman on television. You have to be so outrageous to be the most unlikeable woman on tv, but Erika is totally outrageous. I can forgive her for the crazy fashion choices she makes, but she is totally out of line to think that she can just yell at America and tell the whole free world what to do because she is a widow. She is furious, not with the people who killed Charlie, and not with the authorities who refuse to investigate, but with millions of Americans who refuse to blindly obey her. Erika is so mad at us because we won’t shut up when she tells us to and she isn’t afraid to say so: she very much disapproves of us, and she wants us to know that. Who the hell does this woman think she is, and who are the idiots who are egging her on?

WE disapprove of you, too, Erika. We disapprove of you too.