Humor in Uniform: The Beer Tent – Explained

A concerned reader asked, “How did the Beer Tent get stocked in the first place?”

Answer: It was early November and my battalion was in Okinawa, Japan on a 6 month Unit Deployment Program (UDP), and our Regimental Commander was Col Zinni who was to later gain notoriety for opposing Gulf War II. Not that that has anything much to do with this tale. Anyway we were preparing to deploy to northern Japan (mainland) to conduct a joint training exercise with the Japanese Ground Self-Defense Force (JGSDF). Because we were going to be there on Thanksgiving Day the leadership thought it would be nice if we were to host the JGSDF for Thanksgiving dinner. Problem was that there was no way to legally fund that expense, so they came up with a scheme to raise the necessary funds.

The idea was to put up a Beer Tent between the two tent cities (Japanese and ours were separated by some distance) where folks could get drunk, start fights, and exchange articles of uniforms. (Speaking of which, when we re-deployed I don’t think one enlisted Marine was in regulation uniform. What a sight they were in that final formation before we boarded the planes!) Meantime while this was going on the Japanese soldiers were funding their Thanksgiving dinner through their consumption of American beer. The Japanese thought that the price for beer was ridiculously cheap and they bought it like it was going out of style, which it quickly did.

Meanwhile back at the ranch (still in Okinawa {Oki}) in late Oct “the word” went out that everyone had to pitch in $5.00 towards the purchase of beer that would be transported by C-130 from Oki to the training area on the Japanese mainland. There was no option-out as a few Marines discovered when they pitched a bitch. Let me rephrase that, anyone could choose not to “donate” the 5 bucks; but those individuals would be put on the roster for permanent guard and/or KP duty while we were training (~1 month) with the JGSDF. I don’t recall exactly but believe, if any, there were less than a handful that chose Option B.

Eventually, 99.99% of the Marines in my infantry battalion cough up their fin and a C-130 full of beer with a couple of armed guards riding shotgun to protect the valuable cargo flies for fun and profit to mainland Japan.

I had never seen a Beer Tent set up on a Partner Nation’s training ground for joint consumption before that evolution, and I never saw one again. So yes, the beer run in a USMC helicopter was no ordinary event, not for Lt Bronze Star or me – believe it or not.